Monday 27 October 2008

Digestive incompetence

Ugh.

It's half eight. I should be at work, or at least making my way there. Instead I'm drenched in sweat, and in bed.

I experimented on Saturday night with acting like a normal person, having a meal out, and a couple of beers. I had planned carefully, and selected a Polish restaurant (home to well-cooked vegetables, potatoes and meat). I chose a pasteurised beer. I wasn't expecting to have any issues.

Sunday morning I had some diarrhoea. Just a few bouts, and nothing too alarming. I was a bit peeved at its re-appearance after a fairly successful week of digestion, but figured it would probably settle down if I treated my guts with kid gloves for a day or so. I went easy on them at lunch with a vegetable soup, and had no immediate problems. I went easy on my guts at dinner, with boiled to death vegetables, rice and a recovery shake. I thought it'd be fine.

Overnight I've realised that something has upset the gut gods and they are showing their displeasure.

I haven't slept much. Too much running to the loo and pain from those blasted cramps that I thought I'd left behind. They are miserable things, those cramps. It feels as though my intestines are the gut gods' spaghetti, being stabbed, pulled out and then twirled on their forks. The gut gods are never in a hurry to eat. They play with their food. I wish I wasn't on the menu...

So, anyway. In between trips to the loo this morning, I've called work and explained that I have a bout of gastric incompetence. They are already aware I have the digestive age of a newborn baby - I've previously had to explain why I was slumped over my desk and clutching my guts whilst contorting my features into an expression of agony in a professionally unbecoming manner. Rather me than them, apparently.

It's a bit odd that I'm drenched in sweat. The window was open all night and the room a pleasant temperature. I shouldn't have been oozing buckets. I'd like to change the sheets but have that feeling of weak grimness which easily persuades me that changing the bedding is too much effort at this moment in time, and that turning over the pillows and duvet would be a far better (if grimmer) plan.

Tired.

Sick of the symptoms.

Would like someone to be able to tell me what's up, so I have a better chance of controlling it. Right now I'd also like to turn the clock back, politely decline Saturday's social event and have another jacket spud with tuna yoghurt and a few pints of water instead. But I can't do that. I might be able to sleep, though...

13 comments:

Reading the Signs said...

Oh sh*t, pardon the expletive Doctor Why, in the circumstances - I'm really sorry to hear this. Probably the last thing one needs at times like this is Good Advice, so look away now if you can't bear it, but: have you done the naturopathic route yet? Because in my experience (and I don't just mean me personally), when it comes to digestive disorders it can really get to the root of the matter. Could be you have developed some (temporary) food intolerances. And also - Polish food, love it but it is quite heavy.

Wishing you better.

Prisoner of Hope said...

It does sound like a food intolerance to me too. For what its worth I think one of the (more dramatic) responses to this is to switch to a bland fortified nutritionally balanced drink (as originally developed for astronauts) then assuming everything settles down to patch test the skin for common allergies, and gradually reintroduce food stuffs into the diet. It can be difficult managing the temporary absence of taste and substance initially, especially when having to turn down social invitations. This however is the extreme way of identifying what the intolerance might be, but I'm sure there are more humane approaches available. Perhaps keeping a diary of what you eat and the gut response might help a dietitian/ nutritionist to make some intelligent guesses and then on a trial (suck it and see!) basis see what happens when you add in dairy products, nuts, certain breads etc.

In the meantime here's hoping that the likely Polish antagonists leave your system soon.

Rob Clack said...

Oh poor you! Sympathy, sympathy. I can't make any suggestions about treatment, but I would be hammering on the doctor's door, personally. But I think I'm starting to repeat myself, so I'll stop now. Hope it settles down soon.

But Why? said...

Signs,
I'm rather hoping it is a food intolerance, in which case I'd like to know which foods, and I'll happily excise them from my diet. But if Saturday night was anything to go by, it's either cabbage, potatoes, pork or beer. I'm guessing it's not the spuds, as I've been merrily (well, not quite merrily... dutifully, perhaps) eating those topped off with tuna for some time now. It'd be good if it was the cabbage, but if any of those are to blame, I'm guessing it's the beer. Maybe it's time to go tee-total. I haven't tried the naturopathic route, no. I may get there, particularly if my GP continues to provide sample pots, and a random cycling of drugs before referring me to someone who might be able to help.

PoH,
I did keep a food diary for a while to try to correlate symptoms with foods and so on, but had too many sypmtoms to discern any patterns (and really didn't fancy the drastic route). However, seeing as I'm halfway to surviving on liquid food, I guess I might as well go the whole hog.

Rob C,
I am hammering on the doc's door... well, assaulting their phone system, at any rate. Fed up and demanding a referral.

trousers said...

Oh bloody hell, it's never good to have unsettled guts like that. Sorry that such problems have returned.

You have my sympathy - after all, loose bowels aren't exactly a relaxing prospect for an item of legwear.

(At this point I'm trying to resist mentioning Coeliac's disease - a condition which a friend has. Why am I trying to resist it? Because I've seen the aforementioned friend this weekend, so Coeliac's is bound to occur to me for that reason alone)

But Why? said...

Trousers,
No, it's not good. I've spent the last couple of days trying to rehydrate. At least the cramps seems to have subsided (touch wood), so I might be able to sleep a bit better and regain my sense of humour. It's a bit lacking at the moment.

Bah, humbug.

DJ Kirkby said...

Erm...have you been tested for colitis, coeliac's and chrone's disease? Try to stay away from wheat, dairy and beer until you have. If you are struggling bad with getting a referral email me and I will see if I can do anything to help. xo

But Why? said...

DJ,
Next steps (and I can't say I'm looking forward to them, but I'd really like a diagnosis and something practical to do). Latest advice from my oxygen-thieving GPs is to eat whatever I feel like, as I'll probably eat more that way and might lose less weight. (I might also return to keeping food inside me for less than half an hour, but at least I'll get to appreciate some different tastes.)

DJ Kirkby said...

O2 thieving GP's, lol, very good. Not sure how you manage to keep your sense of humour at a time like this but good for you. I would advise you write a letter of complaint to your local PCT, urgently and ask that you be referred immediatly to a specialist and mention that you will consider litigation if any permanent damage has been caused through this extensive wait for assesment and diagnosis by a gastroenterologist.

Rob Clack said...

Glad to hear you're still in the land of the living, Dr BW. The lack of posts had me wondering, but noting the dates of the comments reassures me. Actually rather missing the rowing expletives. (OK I admit, I'm making stuff up, but it is late.)

But Why? said...

DJ,
I finally got through to my GPs last week (I usually lose patience after half an hour of trying without success to get them on the phone...) An appointment with gastro types is being made. And wouldn't you know it, I'm producing lovely, healthy solid shits...

Rob C,
I'm in the middle of drafting another rowing post, and no doubt will have plenty to say after racing this weekend. It might not be pleasant, though, so your wish for rowing expletives may very soon come true!

DJ Kirkby said...

Isn't that just typical! Chopper would sympathise entirely! Anyway, if there is anything going on, your intestinal mucosa will show signs regardless of the texture of your, ah well, you know what I mean...good luck. If there is no appointment through your door in the next couple of weeks then chase your GP although the actual appointment date may be as long as 18 weeks away so don't push yourself too hard in the meantime.

But Why? said...

DJ,
I'm actually doing pretty well - I have a date with the gastro type in mid December! I may have wasted away by then, but at least it'll stand me in good stead for the traditional xmas overindulgence and 5 lb weight gain...