Newly discovered...

Without further ado, my discoveries of the week:

1. When a motorcyclist appears out of the blue to headbutt your windscreen at high velocity, it really is very much like it looks on the advert*;
   
2. Even under conditions of shock, my concerns are attuned primarily to ensuring the laws of physics have been maintained rather than ensuring the well-being of my fellow homo sapiens. Rather worryingly, after the collision, my first thoughts were along the lines of "It looks like a motorcyclist has just wrapped himself around my car... and disappeared. How on earth did that happen?" rather than something along the lines of "I wonder whether that chap is badly hurt?";
   
3. When a young and spotty estate agent turns up late to a viewing, then leaves me to wander around in the rain whilst he shows the property to the other interested parties (who also showed up half an hour late) and does not see fit to apologise, I become disproportionately incensed by people who can't keep appointments and don't see fit to give you the courtesy of a call to let you know they'll be late;
   
4. Estate agents are quite possibly a separate species from the rest of us (but refer to Point 8);
   
5. If you put a hundred people and a room and make them dance for two hours, the room becomes very hot and sweaty and rather unpleasant. This is particularly true after 9pm when the doors of the facility have to remain closed to prevent any wayward strains reaching the delicate ears of the local residents;
   
6. Some of my colleagues really do care about my well-being;
   
7. Cops are really rather good at doing an interesting mix of practicality and understanding - a cop friend making a home visit brought me biscuits, chocolate, and alcohol to cheer me up after writing off my car in afore-mentioned motorcycle incident and, because she'd been warned my house had no heating, also brought two tins of soup in case I needed something hot and warming. Awwwww....;
   
8. Used car sales types share only 70% of their DNA with the rest of humanity. The rest of it appears to be common to woodlice, snakes, and other things that shelter under stones;
   
9. Power steering and central locking is all rather nice, isn't it?

Next week I hope to discover many less shocking, incensing and expensive things...

*No motorcyclists were seriously harmed in the making of this post

Pick and Mix

The people who've made my day (some for the better others for the worse. All the more remarkable):

1. The Bearded Lady Of Guildford (BLOG), who appears to have taken up residence at the train station. I wish I was in less of a hurry in the mornings, and instead had enough time to engage in conversation. I'm sure it'd be enlightening.
   
2. The guy with a tattoo of something which looked like it was supposed to be the Magna Carta on the inside of his right forearm, who I sat next to on the train to Clapham Junction. So many questions I'd like to ask him: Why that? Why there? and Do they have deodorant on your planet?
   
3. The cop who was silent with deafening levels of anger throughout this morning's 'Lessons Learned' meeting.
   
4. The colleague who praised me for keeping my cool on the rather crazy day that was last Thursday. This is the same colleague with whom I regularly get absorbed in conversations, get into lifts, and between us forget to press the button for the ground/20th floor. We usually discover our folly after maybe half a minute when someone gets in on the same floor we think we left some moments ago. She puts the mishap down to having had a 'senior moment'. I usually blame the oversight on the generationally-neutral 'being away on a micro-holiday'. We managed that twice today...
   
5. The guy who pushed me out of the way to get a seat on the Guildford train, only to endure thirty minutes of my noticing his immense and unrivalled levels of dandruff. It was a truly spectacular collection (or is there a more accurate collective noun for dandruff flakes - a blizzard, perhaps? or maybe a drift?) of flakes. Most remarkable, but not exactly eye-candy. Far from it.
   
6. The well-spoken hoodie with a pleasant accent and clear enunciation who very politely asked me for directions to the main High Street in Guildford. My pleasure, young man.
   
7. The friend who is hearteningly, ludicrously, entertainingly, ridiculously, stereotypically and rather endearingly in love. Awwwwwww...

I love people. They're such fun and fascinating things.